Courage Network

It is all too often that as men and women we enter into relationships before we understand ourselves. We find ourselves pouring out our hearts, minds and bodies to individuals in hope and prayer that they will begin to understand us. The problem is that we have not yet began to understand ourselves. We long for them to have revelation of who we are when in fact we are struggling with who we are. We then become angry and hurt by the fact that they have neither committed to us nor loved us the way that we need to be loved.

Too often this is an oxymoron within our own psyche. We enter into relationship over and over again becoming repeat offenders in the gospel that we call love. The problem is that we have never loved the way that God intended. When God created Adam and Eve he created them to love unselfishly. The original intent of love was to be sacrificing of ones’ self for the other individual. If I put your needs ahead of my needs then that makes me a better mate.

Society teaches us to preserve self. Look out for you. Take care of you. When we are not connected in relationship, this is an apparent truth. My only issue with that is that when I study the scriptures Jesus wasn’t just about him. His entire life was about service and dedication to others. If I am looking to be more Christ like, shouldn’t I be looking for opportunities to serve?

I realized that within my own relationships I was looking for someone to be there for me. I desired someone to love me for me. The truth is that I didn’t love me for me. I kept looking at the broken parts and re-breaking. Is it anyone else’s fault that my relationships didn’t last? No—it is mine. I should have been whole walking into a relationship. I should have loved myself enough to know what was acceptable and what wasn’t. Insecurities have no place in relationship. I marvel at relationships where the two people know who they are going into them. I celebrate those relationships. So, right now I celebrate me, I love me because the next time I choose to love someone else, I will know that I have truly learned how to love me therefore I can love them—holistically.

So today I affirm myself. Today I tell myself I am beautiful, wonderful, magnificent. I am a bad—bad—sister. I love me and if you want to be in my life, YOU have to treat me the way that GOD would see fit. If you are a catalyst of hurt and pain—keep it moving because I am NOT. I am LOVE. I am PASSION. I am BEAUTIFUL inside and out. I am CREATION because the CREATOR lives through me.